Posted by: foodtraveller | November 9, 2009

What am I thinking now?

Escape from my home-office


when I feel toxic I escape & detoxicate!


Im staring at this Christmas decor to cover up my loneliness!

I cried last night. Yes its my birthday. I am suppose to atleast cry for joy and I guess I feel shuttered for a while. I regained my self though. So many bad aura around me. I need detoxification & life decluttering but I dont know where to start. Maybe Im really shuttered last night? 😦

Now that I escape from home (AGAIN) I feel whole. I feel smart & I feel that my powers as a superhero is back. I learned from the past 30 years of my life I am always rescuing somebody & solving everybody’s problem & mishap while leaving mine hunging & nobody would even dare to lend a hand. I always cry. Its my way of coping. I cry if Im helpless.

I wanna build the puzzled life I had. A fun one. A beautiful one. My life is like a falls, it keeps flowing, giving so much fun to others while after the last splash we dont even know where to really go?! Weird. I guess life is weird, we just have to learn accepting the facts of life. Can I?

This time I should face the shocking news with full of composure & full of strenght. Strenght is hard to define. Nobody has this. Im sure nobody but God. We all have weaknesses & I guess those weaknesses makes us strong. Strong enough to overcome our own bad will & strong enough to say NO to all evil.


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